It can be easy to get caught up in the seriousness of alcohol and its effects. After all, it is a serious topic.
But if it is all doom and gloom, it becomes something to avoid. Something we push to the back of our minds because looking at it brings up fear.
I was afraid to stop drinking for more reasons than I can list here. But as time has passed, I now see those fears as signals. Red lights I refused to pay attention to. I just kept going, playing the game, pretending I was fine. I was not fine.
Once I faced those fears, slowly and with support, I realised two things. They were far less solid than they felt, things like “I will never have fun again” and “nobody will want to be my friend.” And they were also completely unfounded.
The human brain can be remarkably creative when it wants to avoid change. That is not laziness or weakness. It is just normal.
Why Your Brain Makes Excuses
Whenever we stand on the edge of something new, whether that is taking a break from alcohol, starting a new habit, or saying yes to something that scares us, the brain serves up a long list of objections and excuses.
It does this because it will always choose the known over the unknown. It does everything it can to keep us in familiar patterns because familiar feels safe. This is especially true if you have tried to quit before, had a difficult time, and gone back to drinking. Your brain remembers that and uses it against you.
The excuses feel convincing because you have rehearsed them for years. They feel completely true in the moment.
I have been so good, I deserve this. One will not hurt. It is just the wrong time, I will start again tomorrow.
These are not signs of failure. They are mental loops, predictable patterns your brain runs to keep you comfortable. The trick is to spot them, name them, and then choose differently.
A Lighter Way to Look at It
In the spirit of not making this heavier than it needs to be, I created something called Objections Bingo for my groups a while ago and it has been one of the most popular tools I have shared.
Instead of beating yourself up when these thoughts appear, or letting them pull you back in, you treat them like squares on a bingo card. Oh look, I just hit a square. “Maybe moderation will work this time.” Bingo.
Humour takes the power out of shame. Awareness is always the first step. And recognising an objection as an objection, rather than a truth, is how you start to change the pattern. Change does not have to feel heavy all the time. It can be curious, light, and even a little playful.
How to Use It
Download the bingo sheet and keep it somewhere visible. Each time one of these objections appears in your mind, check it off. Notice which ones come up most often for you without judging yourself for it. Then simply acknowledge that you spotted it instead of obeying it.
That moment of recognition is not small. Every time you see an objection for what it is, you are building clarity and taking back a little more control.
Your objections are not the enemy. They are part of the process. The goal is not to never have them. The goal is to stop letting them make the decision for you.
You can download the free Objections Bingo sheet and start playing today.
And if you want to understand more about why the brain fights change so hard, the mental programming behind alcohol habits goes deeper on exactly that.
With lightness, Sarah Connelly
