Moderation Is A Trap

Moderation is a Trap (And I Was the Queen of Trying)

I didn’t want to quit forever. I just wanted to drink like a normal person. A few glasses here and there. A wine with dinner. That kind of thing.

So, I made rules:

No drinking on weeknights.
Only one glass.
Only when socialising.

None of them lasted.

Why? Because I still believed alcohol added value to my life.

The question “Why can’t I moderate?” assumes there’s something wrong with you. But the real question is, “Why am I trying so hard to make an addictive, toxic substance fit into a healthy life?”

Moderation kept me tethered. It wasn’t freedom. It was a constant mental negotiation.

Freedom came when I stopped trying to control alcohol and started designing a life that didn’t need it.

This isn’t about missing out. It’s about reclaiming all the things alcohol quietly steals: energy, sleep, confidence, mental clarity.

If you’re caught in the moderation loop, ask yourself these questions:

1. Do I really enjoy one drink? Or do I crave more once I start?
2. How much mental space is occupied with trying to control my drinking?
3. Do I genuinely enjoy life when I’m trying to moderate?
4. Is there any evidence from my past that I can moderate long-term?

And if you decide to moderate, have a look at the questions you will need to consider ( and how much time this may take )

The list below was shared by Jolene Park - My trainer for Grey Area Drinking coaching.

How many drinks a week will you have?

When you drink, how many drinks will you have?
Will you just drink on the weekends? Or during the week too?
Will you drink alone (at home) or only when you're out socializing?
Will you plan ahead (at least 48 hours) or just "cash in your drink ticket" when the mood hits?
What is the "consequence" for drinking more than you intended?
Will you drink back-to-back days or spread out your drinking over the course of a week?

Clarity and self-honesty are a must.

 Warmly,

Sarah Connelly