How To Interrupt An Automatic Drink

How to Interrupt an Automatic Drink (Without Willpower Battles)

When I was drinking, I would often find myself pouring a glass of wine on a Monday night and drinking it before I became aware of what I was doing. It felt like something in my brain would take over, and I was like a robot, following orders, even though I was determined to only drink on weekends.

If that lands, you’re not weak — you’re human. What you’re experiencing is a fast, well-rehearsed habit loop. A cue fires (email stress, cooking dinner, the quiet after the kids go down), your brain predicts and anticipates relief from alcohol, and your body moves before your conscious mind checks in.

The solution isn’t easy at first, but if you want to gain more control, then it’s time to commit to one thing. The pause -  which can change everything.

Here’s why:

Why the Pause Works (even if willpower hasn’t)

• Habits are speed: Your brain loves shortcuts. Evening → wine → relief. The pause slows the sequence down and creates space to move from reactivity to a conscious response.
• Emotion precedes action: Cravings spike and fall in waves. On average they last 20 minutes so a short pause helps you ride the wave instead of wiping out.
• Choice beats rules: “I’m never drinking on weekdays” sets up an inner resistance, a fight and in turn, more stress. A pause creates options: now, later, or not at all.

The 60-Second Power Pause

You don’t have to “quit forever” to use this. Try it tonight.

1. Notice and Name it.
   “This is a craving. My brain is asking for relief.” (Naming lowers intensity.)
2. Feel it safely.
   Put one hand on your chest, one on your belly. Breathe slowly for six counts in, six out (about 5–10 breaths).
3. Check HALT.
   Am I Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired? Meet that need first (snack, quick walk, text a friend, sit or lie down, close your eyes and breathe).
4. Offer a swap.
   Choose one pre-decided 5-minute alternative:
• Sparkling water + citrus in a wine glass
• Hot shower or outside air for two minutes
• 90-second wall push (isometrics discharge tension fast)
• Put on one song and stretch

1. Decide on purpose.
   After the minute, choose: have the drink, delay 15 minutes, or skip it. Whatever you choose, you chose it — not the autopilot.

Pro tip: Put a sticky note where you’d usually pour. “Pause first.” Make the pause as visible as the wine.

What to Expect in Week One

• You’ll forget. That’s normal. Catch it next time.
• You may still drink sometimes. The win is pausing first.
• Cravings will change shape. They soften once you breathe, eat, or connect.

Track it simply: each evening, jot P/D/S (Paused / Drank / Skipped) in your notes. You’re building data, not judging yourself.

Scripts for Real Life

• Partner offers a glass:
  “Looks great — I’m just going to do something first, you go ahead.”
• Friends ask why you’re not drinking:
  “ I’m just experimenting with less drinking. I might have one later”
• End-of-day urge hits hard:
  “This is my ‘relief’ cue. I can create relief with breath + water first.”

If You Do Pour

Still pause. Smell it. Notice the thoughts. Take one slow sip. Ask, “What do I actually need right now?” You may continue — or you may realise the sip scratched the itch and you’re done. Either way, you practiced regaining choice.

Build a “Relief Kit” (so you’re not improvising at 6 p.m.)

Keep these ready where the wine lives:

• Favourite AF drink + cold glassware
• High-protein snack (nuts, yogurt, cheese)
• Headphones with a 3-minute “reset” track
• A printed HALT card
• One comfort item (throw, candle, book of inspirational quotes )

The goal isn’t to be perfect — it’s to make the healthier relief easy, and closer to hand than the bottle.

Common Sticking Points (and gentle reframes)

• “One won’t hurt.”
  Maybe. But first, one minute won’t hurt either. Pause, then choose.
• “I deserve it.”
  You deserve relief. Let’s deliver relief first (food, breath, warmth). If you still want the drink, decide with a settled nervous system.
• “It’s automatic.”
  Exactly why the pause works. We’re inserting a speed bump into an automatic street.

A 7-Day Micro-Challenge

For the next week, do one thing only: pause before the first drink.
No other rules. At the end of seven days, notice:

• Sleep quality
• Morning mood
• How many drinks were “automatic” vs “chosen”

You’re not proving discipline; you’re gathering intelligence about your evenings.

If You Want to Go Further

• Choose two “on-ramp” evenings this week to stay alcohol-free (e.g., Mon/Wed). Use your Relief Kit and the 60-Second Pause.
• Tell one safe person: “I’m running a one-week experiment. I’m practicing a 60-second pause before I pour.”

Bottom line

You don’t need a lifetime decision to change tonight.
You need sixty seconds of space.

The pause won’t judge you. It won’t shame you. It simply hands the steering wheel back to you — so the part that truly cares about your health, your sleep, your mornings, and your self-respect gets a say.

Start with one minute. See what happens next.

Here’s to taking back control of your choices,

Warmly,

Sarah Connelly